Suicide?

When I wake up Im thinking the way how to suicide, am i sot jor.

Anyway not his fault, everything is me oni mah. Better me die, then will be no problem at all.

I think of go to balcony and jump off, seems very strong power ask me to do so. How?

Is it an end for me?

Silent with tears

After a while, my tears coming back. But i try to control it.

Now it hard for me to control, my heart so pain. Again ppl lie to me, why i always being trapped.

Cause of my stupidity, i guess. Im just rubbish anyway, that why ppl treat me like rubbish. Simply throw something to me.

So sad and it have tears on my eye. Too sad to do assignment. I cant take this off my mind.

Scene by scene bad things that happen to me last time, flash back in my brain. I think I need to restart myself, might be have a sleep first. I dun wan think of the bad things, it very awful to me. I hate that. But my heart is so pain. I cant think except my heart is so pain. Damn it!

I feel like I wanna go back home. Dun wan ever talk or see........

Preasure

Today is the due date to submit assignment. Yes, I damn worry. Im even MC to do assignment but is still the same. I unable to do it. Im more more worry and my head so damn pain.

But till now i dunno its pain anymore, maybe it pain till i cant feel anything. When i try to think, my brain is more pain. So so so worry :( Feel wanna cry. But in this middle of the nite, I cant find anybody, but i write in the blog again.

I really cant write anything. Why? why? why? I really feel like no more mood to study but my family keep on ask me when i can finish my MBA. I say next year. Actually i can slowly finish my studies but coz i feel so preasure already.

assignment fever

well from now, i oso unable to write a word...how leh

me going to be crazy soon...adoi...wat is going on....

hmm..another triangle love is going on, i also dunno wat to do...hmmm

In Despair

Well...y im still so stubborn and do not want to face reality,
u wan till see him marry oni u will give up izzit?
now confirm..super confirm he have gf liao...

So wat, y my heart feel ache...y leh....
y im still love him...i oso dunno...
maybe im in period...tat y i fell so sad

metal heart?

Im so sad...really sad...
when i really prepare for myself...
when my heart become n metal...
even anybody say about him, my heart will never cry..
is tat possible?

adoi...wat am i going to do...
he throw i present the hp to him?
is that wat he do....
he throw away all the memories me with him....
why he so cruel....

i aledi expected...to start this new job..i need to face the c2pig hing
he will tell his news, tat i wun like to hear...
but he tell me...he change his new hp...
he have say b4 he never change the hp..
as i buy for him..have many memories....

now izzit the memories is no use for him....
is i no more important to him
and he tell me he wun waste money on car
now he buy new vios...

is he changing....hing say he become more more handsome..
if he bring her new gf out...i dun think so i can take it....
wat am i going to do...im so sad...really sad
my tears keep on dropping...

my heart so sad..n crying while i get to know this..
why am i so weak...
how am i going to prepare my exam...
if my mood continue to be like...
if my heart is continue crying...
wat am i going to do.....

why im still thinking of him
i really hope my love to him will be fade..

god...pls help me...
pls help to stop my tears now...keep on dropping....
pls help me to stop my sadness...
i think i so go off earlier...
more earlier...so i can left far far away from this sadness...

my feeling

Everytime period time is my sad time,
i think this cause of hormon...well unbalance ...make my heart sad...
he is right, im always think of him...siang siang..
nobody can replace him in my heart...
i cant even start a new relatioship...
well how....